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Heidi Montag on Beauty

I apologize if this is really random, especially after not having posted in months, but I needed some sort of outlet and I turned to this.

I know. It's weird for me to all of a sudden be so fascinated with Heidi Montag. I never really followed Laguna Beach/The Hills/whatever and never truly took an interest in anything that relates to her before this. But I was intrigued by an article on Yahoo! about her recent plastic surgery and was shocked at what I read and saw.

One of my friends had reblogged this on her Tumblr and I found this video above that just reminded me of it:

How can having green contacts when you’re brown-eyed and long hair extensions when your hair is really cut short be considered “beautiful”? IT’S NOT FUCKING REAL.
That is so sad. You’re admiring superficial products; all of you.

Throughout my life, I've heard people say repeatedly "beauty is within," and "it's inner beauty that counts." After seeing this video, I further lost faith in the media. I was truly disappointed hearing those people being interviewed almost praising plastic surgery for cosmetic reasons. Plastic surgery can do wonders and help people with serious need for it, but I feel that it's wrong when it's used so that other people can find you more attractive, especially when you were already attractive in the first place. I also feel like what they said, especially towards the end, reinforces the point that people's concept of beauty within others is superficial. Very superficial. Knowing that that show has been broad casted and viewed by so many people in the U.S. and the world makes me wonder how many more will continue to buy into this bullshit and how many realize that they're not speaking the truth.

There were so many conflicting emotions and confused moments that I had with the first video. It's really saddening to hear her responses to the questions. She is obviously unhappy with herself, especially with the way she looks. You hear her say in the beginning of her interview that "[double D breasts] don't look that big," hinting that she may want even bigger ones done.

Heidi also defends what she says about the message she's trying to send to little girls. She wants people to know that beauty comes from within, but her actions portray a completely different message. She says that "those other girls" aren't in the same industry that she's in, but that shouldn't matter. I understand that there are so many pressures to look perfect within Hollywood and the entertainment industry. Even though I may never be able to empathize to those women working in that industry, I feel like she's still sending out the wrong message. To me, her actions send out the message that natural talent and natural beauty is no longer enough to succeed in this world. And it may not be.

It really astonishes and scares me that Heidi is only 23 years old. She's only two years older than me. TWO. It scares me knowing that age-wise, she is my peer, but she has such extremely different feelings about herself than what I feel is normal for a young woman in her 20s feels. I can't even begin to think about how many other 20-somethings have had cosmetic surgery done because they can't find a way to deal and find acceptance of themselves.

It's hard to say and know that we live in a superficial world, but I think that it's still important for people to teach others, especially the little children who are so easily influenced at their young age, that there is beauty to be found in everyone. It may not be so apparent and skin deep, but it's there.

Epic & Getting to Know

Well. Survived the first week of school! What a crazy week.. I don't quite know what to say about it. It was what it was!

Living off-campus is different, but I'm pretty sure I like it better. It's a little bit less convenient. I now have to get up two hours before my classes to take the bus to campus and it takes about half-an hour to get home. It's okay. I do like relieving the feeling of not being at school all the time. It feels nicer, and I like the feeling of living in a real home.

School and life is as busy as ever. It's hard for me to believe that just last week, I was back home sleeping my days away. My brain is starting to work hard again, and I really hope that it speeds up soon. I need it! I know that I haven't been functioning well these past couple of days, but I believe that had something to do with the lack of proper sleep as well though.

Tonight, PCE had it's first event, inviting new members to our club called "Getting to Know." It's basically a social and gave a little preview of what's to come. I met a lot of new people, but I probably can't remember a lot of them yet. Hopefully I'll see them around more and I'll remember them soon! It's so exciting! I just wish that I could do all the things that I did last year (and probably more), but the pressure is on and I realize that I can't keep putting off my studies for more social time. It's a lot of fun though! We'll see how it goes. I would probably be really tired all the time, but it was really fun last year! I don't regret doing everything last year, but it's time to grow up a little bit more and pick and choose which events are worth going to.

First days of school

I can't believe it's my third year in college! Even though it's only been two years, I feel like it's been so much longer! Is that a good thing or not? Eep.

I say it's a good thing. Looking back on my past two years, I feel like I've been able to do a lot. It's definitely been a very full two years and I'm about to start another one. It's been a crazy blur but a very fun one!

I'm starting school tomorrow! I should really be sleeping but I'm filled with excitement and worries that I might forget something. Hoping to get an early start tomorrow though. Get things ready for the new quarter. It's looking like a tough one, class-wise, but definitely looking forward to being busy and productive again!

Okay so..

I really don't want to complain about anything, but I guess this will be more of a 'what makes me really sad' post.

It makes me really sad living off-campus without a car. Even though my roommates and my friends all have cars, it's so inconvenient not having my own. If I need to go out to run errands of my own or need to be somewhere, I don't want to ask them to take me, especially if they don't need to be there. I feel so bad! All my roomies have boyfriends too, so they're not home too often. I knew this was coming, that I'd be home by myself a lot. I just didn't expect that I wouldn't be able to go out when I wanted.

So.. here's to the many days and nights spent inside my room! Pictures soon! I'm still tidying up. =]

Oh man

Lesson learned. Don't upgrade to iTunes 9 or iPhone 3.1 just yet. O jeez.

I'm afraid that if I sleep now, I won't wake up in time to pack my things up for SLO in the morning. But I guess if I put it off longer, I might crash even harder later on.

Farewell to my family and friends back home! I hope to see you soon! I'll try to keep this blog updated as much as I can. I'm a little tired for a long post right now. =/ Hopefully tomorrow night!

Because this song makes me feel good

while I'm trying to fix this mess that I'm in.. updating my brother's iPhone...